Wedding Hell

Wow it has been awhile since I last said something. I have a few friends trying to encourage me too blog...well here it is.

Let me get some things off my chest. As you know I have decided to take that walk towards the part two of a relationship...marriage...and all I can say is WOW. The big day is this saturday and I have never had this many things happen to me in one week.

First off I fell and had and accident that left me physically banged up. And of all places the FACE...how do you get married and decide to do something suicidal like that...well I accomplished it with grace. So we have the accident ... with no hopes of being completely healed by Saturday.

Next I have entered seamstress HELL...I have had dresses not ready...dresses incorrectly made...bridesmaids not showing up for their fittings...what more can go wrong...oh wait let me not ask that question because I am almost certain someone will show me. On top of that I had my dress made wanting to have the dresses designs steming from 4 other dresses ( i know that sounds wierd) but it isnt. When I saw my dress I was like are you for real. It definitely wasnt what I expected. It definitely wasn't ugly but it wasnt what I imagined....Damn....Damn...Damn

We had people that made it to first rehearsal 1.5 hours late. The groom and bestman taking the place of missing people. How tacky is that. We had people bring their children to rehearsal. It was crazy. But when the lime light isnt exactly pointed on a select few they have a tendacy to not care about the next person.

Then everyone had the nerve to ask me why I decided to not indulge them in certain amenities... my response was "kiss my ass"...

The biggest thing that I am highly upset about it the fact that back in February I went ahead and purchased my favors from this home based company that had thousands of happy customers and I am pretty sure a handful of (non-advertised) unhappy customers. It is now 4 days from my big day and tell me why I havent received my favors yet. They told me that my order would be getting made and shipped 3 weeks ago. Why is no one returning my communications with them. That is what has had me PISSED (to the tenth power) off. So I needed a back up plan...I had to figure out what could I come up with in the next four days and went out and bought even more items. I better not have this much trouble getting my money back and making sure that I am an advertised un-happy customer.

At this point I should be nervous and giddy about the day but as of right now the only thing that I keep telling myself is that I can't wait for it too be over....aarrgh

Gotta Getcha Getcha Getcha All Caught Up

Well as you can see I haven't blogged since 4th quarter of last year. Well since then some things have changed.... Let's get caught up....

1) The Automobile - Well I didn't have to replace my engine but I am still having work done on it. When you don't have the yearly maintenance checks this can be an ongoing process. So after a few more repairs that I know of now... that will be complete. It is just as we fix one thing we find something else that needs to be fixed.

2) Mr. Man - I think the last time I blogged I had broken up with Mr. Man and called off the wedding and all of that good stuff. Well we are back together and the wedding plans are going great. We worked and still working things out. I held out longer this time. We didn't get back together until the last week in December. I am actually proud of myself for being strong and only deciding to go back when I felt it was the right thing to do. I think the holding out so long gave Mr. Man a reality check also. He realized that I must really be getting fed up and really considering leaving. With all said and done it's time to party.

Now my new challenge is a new soon to be brides most horrific challenge. Dropping the unwanted pounds before the big day. I am trying new things to drop some chunks of pounds. I haven't found anything that I want to stick to with the exception of going to to the gym. I need some sort of quick results diet to add to my work out. I am running out of time. I have 4 months from my first dress fitting and 6 months from the wedding. I am desperate right now. I want to drop 60 pounds by June (4 months away) and whatever more I can manage by August (6 months away). So I need to lose 15 pounds a month for the next 4 months and then it would be nice to drop another 20-30 the following two months (I am not asking to much in the last two months). We will see. You only get married once (or should I rephrase that and say) you SHOULD only get married once.

So I had decided to let my wedding party choose their own dresses (different styles) to accentuate their different body types. The color and fabric would be the same since I am going to have a seamstress make them but that option changed quickly. There are two girls in the group that doesn't accept the fact that yes I said that I am willing to let everyone wear something different as long as I ok it. I am not trying to have a hoochiefied wedding party and they just can't accept my no's. They go back and forth with me constantly. No means no. So now I have decided to accept suggestions on different dresses. But only one will be chosen for all to wear. It is like everyone has forgotten who's day it is. I have some of them telling me that they are going to look better than the bride and all of this other crap. They are crazy. So we are going to have our first meeting. This will be interesting. I will keep you posted....

Unexplainable Infatuation

Ok so I think I need a therapist right now. I am pretty sure that everyone has heard all the rumors going on surrounding Janet... Ms. Jackson if your nasty...in regards to this alleged secret daughter she has. I have to admit when I seen the picture of the girl she definitely looks like Janet. She is pretty. Well that made me start thinking about things. I have always liked Janet Jackson. I remember being young and listening to her album "Control" all the time...like over and over again. As I got older I remained a fan of hers. But listening to her music and watching her perform or seeing her in videos always stirred up a curiosity in me. I have never imagined "what if's" about another woman that is...if you know what I mean. I don't consider myself bi - bi-curious or anything of that nature. I have never been attracted to another woman let alone explore anything on that level. I have always and will remain strictly dickly. But with Janet it is wierd. Since I have never been in that type of situation I wouldn't know what to do. But I always imagine myself being very submissive to her. Letting her do anything she wants to me and teaching me so much. I mean I have actually dreamed this. It is so wierd, I honestly think something is wrong. I told my friend about this and she called me crazy. Not like I haven't been told that before. I hate the fact that when I see her or hear her I think of her in a sensual way; like she is some sort of male hearthrob. I don't know. I know that I will never get the chance to even see if I would actually explore the notion of being with her being that I will never find myself in that type of situation with her. Oh well I guess she will always be my secret fantasy. Mr. Man thinks I am crazy also. I told him about it. I guess he doesn't care since it isn't like I am telling him that I am infatuated with the boy next door or something like that. There isn't any competition there with a female celebrity. And he's a man so if anything he would love for that too happen. Me, Her, and Him. Isn't that like the average man's number one fantasy...to have his cake and ice cream and cookies. Well if I ever meet her and my fantasy has been made reality I will definitely let you know...

Get "Real World"...Love At First Sight based off of "The Feeling I am Having in my Pee Pee"

So I stayed up last night until early this morning trying to catch up on all of the "Real World Austins" that I have missed in past weeks. MTV had a marathon going on. I have been watching real world faithfully since the very first one. And I have really noticed how it has changed over the years. The people went from wanting something out of life or having some sort of goal needing to be achieved to what the people want now a days. The people today just want to stay in a cool place, get drunk, and screw some one new every night (whether that be a roommate or not). They are given these less than part time jobs that they complain about because they have to wake up at noon and get ready for work. Boo Hoo. If you ever want to be on real world DO NOT send in an audition tape displaying any type of common sense, morals, and knowing about anything you may want out of life. Sorry only Model Material Need Apply. So anyhow this season we have Danny and Melinda who have fallen in love with eachother. This all happened within the first 3 days of being in the house. Come on now. I think this was just a "when everybooty else fails" bootycall backup. They were the first in the house to have sex and yes with eachother. How do you even fix your mouth to tell someone that not only do you love them but you have fallen in love with them and can't see life without them all in the first five days of knowing them? OK I am pretty sure there are some folks out there that beg to differ...STALKERS...but that's not healthy and I can only associate it with early childhood traumatic experiences that need to be dealt with. In other words...you have issues. If someone ever came up to me and said that they were in love with me before they even knew my last name, I'm running. Then we have Rachel who was in Iraq for year as a nurse. I commend her and all of our fellow Americans that are over there risking their lives for .... what are we over there for again? But she associates everything she does with PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). When she snaps ands says stupid things or when she is out at the night clubs on top of the bars and making out with everyone that passes her (and yes so far she has a boyfriend named Eric waiting for her). Well that is at least until Tuesday (all new episode). She blames all of this on PTSD which she got after coming home from Iraq. Now I don't know and this is only my opinion but if I had spent a year in Iraq watching our American Soldiers and Civilians die every damn day while fearing for my own life at the same time, I surely wouldn't come home, get on real world, act like a rude slut, and blame it on a post-war disorder. What goes through these people's minds. They should be embarrassed that MILLIONS of people around the world are watching them. But after the season ends there's always "Real World vs Road Rules". Too me they are just the people that went home after the season ended and still realized that they still didn't know what the hell they wanted to do with their life. Then said to themselves..."There's always MTV"......

Damn...Damn...Damn...

I have to go and try to raise the Benz Window up.

I Know This Feeling All Too Well

I am so stressed out right now. Between my car and my relationship I am not sure which way too go. I still don't know which way to go with my car. The person looking at my engine is on some schedule that they have not clued me in on. When people think that they are doing you a favor they don't treat you like all their other customers (with some sort of professionalism and urgency), but it's ok. I might just take my money that I am saving using them and go to someone else. At least I will know which way I need to go. Then me and Mr. Man are not getting along too well right now. It's too the point that I have called off the wedding. I am pretty sure that we will be back too normal by the end of this week to early next week. But right now I want my car back more than I want us back. I know that sounds bad, but you would have to feel and understand what I am going through right now. I feel like everything wants to go wrong all at once. I can deal with one tradegy at a time but I am not in the mood to deal with more than a weeks worth all at once. I just want to scream. You know what I think that's what I need to do. I will be right back....

Good...Bad...Worst

So here's the deal. I was ecstatic over the fact that everything was somewhat falling into place with my wedding planning so far (yeah I don't need a wedding planner that will have dreams of running off with the groom...I've seen all the movies). I am able to basically get what I am looking for at very bargain prices which is so unreal to me. It's been great. It's been so great that I am trying to figure out why. In life (at least mine) you can't have too many things happen without a tradegy inbetween. So I think I thought myself into a tradegy. All this week I have been saying ok too much has went right I know something is going to go wrong. But I assumed that the wrong was going to do something directly with the wedding planning. Like pricing increasing on quotes that I have been requesting and other things of that nature. Well guess what I have done it. As of Wednesday night I have a huge expense that I have thought myself into. I have to replace the ENGINE in my car. Can we say about $1,000.00! Do you know how devasting that is. That means that $1000.00 worth of deposits and what nots down the drain for the wedding. All that research gone down the drain. Well I am going to stay encouraged but it is hard coming back from a $1,000.00 tradegy especially when you are already damn near living from paycheck to paycheck. Oh well we will see what happens. So my advice for the day is do not think yourself into a tradegy that will become reality and bite your bank account in the ass.

Shout Out

I want to send a shout out to

Tigerlady T

"Heeyyyy"


Ha Ha